Friday, 12 March 2010


So for my birthday I got a sewing machine and i'd been pretty glued to it ever since. I've always been creative but since being at uni i've lost the will to draw and paint and make stuff that i had before. I like making things cos you always have something to show for it at the end, something to be proud of. I made these knickers from scratch, i think they turned out really well.

Wednesday, 16 December 2009

Something New

I’ve come to a fork. Well, a knife that I am brazing into a fork. Everything I’ve been doing lately has been shouting NO at me but I’ve chosen not to listen. Until now. I keep thinking about the future, what the fuck am I going to do with my life? I’ve been kidding myself that I’m going to be a hugely successful inspiring woman that dominates the working world of men. Looking down all I see is a little girl thinking this what she SHOULD do with her life, not necessarily what she wants to. Anyway life has hit rock bottom- I’m sucking up to a bloke who has screwed me over far too many times but I just keeeeep oooon letting him, I’m doing a degree that I have lost the will to live over, I have no source of income and my overdraft isn’t going to withstand the year. That aside, I do have damn good friends but it isn’t enough. I’m doing a MATHS DEGREE. Please someone try to explain to me what was crossing my mind when I signed up to this. It’s not ME. That’s the little person in my brain telling me that it’ll get me an amazing job and success to boot. That’s the part of me that wants to compete with my siblings for my parents’ pride. On finding out my brother was going to be on University Challenge last week I realised I was definitely barking up the wrong tree. (He’s doing phd in maths at oxford...). I watched that film Happy-Go-Lucky last week and it made me think. This is me in ten years. Appreciating the little things in life, the things everyone else takes for granted, rummaging through low-rise bookstores, and laughing. I want to laugh as much as possible. I want to put aside every prejudice in the book and exude a warmth that will cheer every last one of you up. So that is what I am going to do.

Saturday, 13 September 2008

Where to Start...

So i woke up this morning with splitting headache (note to self: tesco £2.80 wine isn't worth the pain) and contemplated life. Well, not so much, i just decided to write a blog. This is my first time at anything like this, i mean i had a diary when i was 12 but that just consisted of "woke up, ate breakfast etc.". No feelings whatsoever. Then i tried to write a novel when i was 13. I gave up after a few weeks. I came back to writing a diary when i was 15 but all i used to say was how much i loved my boyfriend, which frankly isn't that interesting. I think I'm going to like this. It's sort of like an online scrapbook of things i love/hate. I know people who have got obsessed with blogs. I'm kinda hoping i will too.